| By Keme Hawkins What does it mean to go home? It's often referred to as the place that when you have to go there they have to take you in. Others describe home as a place in one's heart or spirit, a feeling of being at peace with one's self and perhaps doing the work that makes one happiest. Some people find home in a person or group of peoples. For all senses and purposes home, in this article will be referred to as my place of origin, the place where I was raised and spent my formative years. It is the place where my mother, grandmother, aunts and uncles live. But it is also a place I left over 10 years ago. I wasn't in trouble. I wasn't going home because I needed to be taken in. I went for a family reunion. Yes, I voluntarily subjected myself to a return home and all that it entails. We have a family reunion every two years and research duties had caused me to miss out on the previous reunion in 2004, so I was due for a visit. I was a little reluctant. I couldn't stop wondering how my period of isolation in the academic tower had affected my ability to relate to anyone outside the world of academia. I had just completed my first year of graduate school, spending the majority of my time studying and teaching. And instead of having a summer break, I was advising first-year students at SOAR. I didn't know how to talk to someone without going into detail about my work or making a joke about overwhelming credit loads. This is a situation common among many college students who are either first generation or just exceeding a level of schooling beyond that of their parents. Maybe it has to do with finally getting a life of one's own and making new inside jokes. But there seems to be more to it. Senior Communication Science and Rhetoric major, Catherine Arnstein isn't a first generation college student but she too has experienced the inevitable gap in communication that most students suffer if even on the smallest level. I have on occasion felt like I was 'teaching my family new thing, Catherine said. However, my parents both attended at least some college and have worked to educate themselves outside of a college setting so I have never felt like I have surpassed my parents' knowledge and have never felt "smarter" than them. While students like Catherine have some success bridging that gap, there are those of us who have entered college with a pre-formed gulf where simply being a college freshman can set one apart from their family. "More than anything, it has put a distance between us,'" said first-year medical student Micaela O'Neil. "My parents have a difficult time relating to the college experience and understanding the transitions that I experience. We have had trouble, at times, relating to one another as my values and beliefs have become increasingly liberal. They also have a very limited understanding of what the college-level work load is like. They basically understand that I will eventually be a doctor." So there I was just north of what we call the armpit of the south. I was back in Oklahoma City. My conversation was suddenly changed. I was used to talking about major requirements, research goals, and Ph.D. applications. In Oklahoma, most of the conversation centered on the Holy bible, church programs, grocery-store prices, family recipes, and baby pictures. This was fine. I needed a break. But the ivory towers of academia can be dreadfully isolating and can make one cold and calloused. One spends all her time thinking about her work or someone else's work she wants to emulate, wondering what classes she will take next semester, and where her future will lead her. And as a graduate student we have it even harder. We are taught to be able to deconstruct every thought, belief, idea, or argument. The academy calls it critical thinking. But what fun is it to tear apart everything that comes out of your family members' mouths, proving that their theories are not as well thought out as they believed. And more often than not, they are not quoting from research they have done, or speaking on well-thought out hypothesis with sound premises. Nope. It is usually just mere opinion. So I learned very quickly to keep my mouth shut. No one likes a smarty pants and I wasn't keen on making my family members feel like they were dumb. Where was the balance? The balance is in realizing that, unfortunately, academia does not represent the real world. It is here in the hollowed halls of the University that we learn how to think and where we formulate the popular opinions soon to be held by the masses. But alas, there is little contact with the world we are examining. As a scholar and the daughter, granddaughter, sister and cousin of people I love and respect tremendously, I am constantly looking for a way to relate my highbrow information to "real-life." Some scholars have done it or are at least attempting to connect with outside world like bell hooks or Yusef Komunyakaa. We should take a lesson from these scholars and push ourselves to find new ways to connect the world and give everyone access to the glory of critical thinking. But for now, I smiled and nodded while I went through baby pictures and pretended to know who was who. |
| Campus Community Connection The Great divide: Going home and getting a degree |
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